On the Edge
By Deanie
May 2005
Rating: PG-13
Title: On the Edge
Author: Deanie
Characters: Logan, Weevil
Word Count: 943
Rating: PG-13
Summary: Logan’s on the edge…
Spoilers/Warnings: Up through 1x22 – “Leave it to Beaver”
Disclaimer: Veronica et al. belong to Rob Thomas and UPN, not me.
Author’s Notes: Once upon a time, there was a girl who loved to write fic… then the
evils of writer’s block and Real Life
“Seriously, what do you…what do you think you can do to me, huh?” Balanced on the railing, flask of vodka in hand, Logan smirked at Weevil. So the bastard wanted to punish him for killing Lilly? Get in line.
“I’ll think of something,” Weevil retorted. Truth be told, the last place he thought he’d find Logan Echolls was in the same spot his mother had killed herself several months earlier.
“You think I killed Lilly. Came here to make me pay?” He gave a drunk giggle, leaning forward, closer to the bikers. “Wanna know a secret? I didn’t kill her.”
Weevil simply stared as Logan straightened up, tipping unsteadily on the thin railing. Did the bastard really expect him to believe that? If Veronica suspected Logan… and she was dating him…
Logan wiped the tears from his eyes. “I loved Lilly… just like you did. I loved her. I could never hurt her. But I guess I’m the only one in Neptune that believes I’m innocent.” He stood up straight, beckoning Weevil forward. “You want to punish me for killing her? You couldn’t possibly do anything more than what’s already been done. Maybe you and my dad could get together sometime. He likes to beat me too, don’t ya know. Mom… I loved her, so much… but I guess she didn’t love me much… not enough to stay. This is the exact spot where she died. Like mother, like son, right?”
Behind him, Weevil heard the gang shifting in their seats. As much as he’d wanted to punish Logan, he hadn’t wanted to kill him. Well, he’d wanted to, but hadn’t intended to. He may be a thug with a borderline moral conscience, but he wasn’t a killer. “Logan,” he began.
“What? You want me to come down from here? Let you beat me into a bloody pulp before throwing me over the edge? Sorry; not going to give you the satisfaction. You’ll have to be happy with seeing me plunge to my death.”
Somewhere in between the drunk ravings, Weevil realized that he believed him. For once, Veronica was wrong… Logan didn’t kill Lilly. He looked up, hearing the sirens in the distance, wondering if Logan would again be the golden boy with someone riding in to save him. Weevil half-turned, waving the guys off. If the police were on their way here to the bridge, having all of them there would mean trouble. But he didn’t get back on his motorcycle. For better or worse, he was going to see this through.
Logan stared at the retreating lights, and then looked back at Weevil. “What? Don’t want any witnesses when you kill me?”
“Get your ass down here, Echolls. You’re not going to kill yourself and we both know it.”
“I’m not?” His words came out in a sob. “Give me one reason why I shouldn’t. There is not a single thing in this world I have to live for. My mother was the one person in my family who cared about me. I loved her so much… but it wasn’t enough, was it? I loved Lilly… but she didn’t love me the same way. Now she’s dead. See the pattern?” Tears glistening in his eyes, Logan looked straight at Weevil. “I loved Veronica, too. Never told her because she was acting all weird. Thought it was something I did wrong… but it wasn’t. All this time, I thought we were building something special. Turns out, she was building a case against me as Lilly’s killer. So much for love…”
He teetered on the edge, wanting more than anything to throw his arms back and fall down into the water below. Let the waves wash over his broken body, ending all the pain forever.
“You think you’re the only person in the world with problems?” Weevil snapped. “Poor Logan… let’s have a pity party. Get over yourself. Everyone has problems… everyone makes mistakes. Life sucks sometimes, but that doesn’t mean you have to throw yourself off a bridge.”
“Everything I touch turns to ashes. The world would be much better off without me. Veronica would be better off without me. Better to kill myself before I kill her too, right?”
“I believe you,” Weevil said quietly, nudging a cigarette butt on the pavement with one shoe.
“What?” Logan stared, confused.
Their gazes locked. “I believe you didn’t kill Lilly. Veronica was wrong. And I can’t wait to tell her smarter-than-thou self when we get back.”
Logan shrugged. “It doesn’t matter.”
“Yes, it does,” Weevil insisted. “I believe you, and I don’t even like you. Once you talk to Veronica she’ll believe you too.”
Moments ago, he had, with perfect clarity, realized that the world would be a much better place without his presence, and strangely enough, Weevil, his sometimes-enemy, was halfway to convincing him he was wrong. “Let me go,” Logan whispered. “I just want it all to be over.”
“Coward,” Weevil accused.
“I guess I am… maybe they can put that on my tombstone.”
“Logan,” Weevil said pointedly, unsure what else to say. “Don’t jump.”
Poised on the edge, both literally and metaphorically, Logan took a deep breath, then lifted up one foot…
… and stepped down to the ground, collapsing in a heap. Great, piteous sobs wracked his body as he huddled into himself. Suddenly, he bent to the side, wretching violently as most of the alcohol he consumed ended up in a sticky mess on the pavement.
Taking pity on his anguished classmate, Weevil grabbed Logan by one arm, hauling him to his feet. “Come on, tough guy. Let’s go find Veronica and get this all straightened out.”